ahunte1 wrote:
BigJoe1963 wrote:
I do find it hard to believe that God was that interested in an obscure county in Nebraska so as to handpick a legislator and then to believe in his cause so much as to saddle him with two controversies in such a short amount of time, but who knows.
The Lord works in mysterious ways.
"God spoke to me one night. He said "CB" (see, He calls me CB because we're buddy buddy). He said "CB, your wife is ill and clearly not doing her wifely duty as proscribed by the Good Book. Go on that internet and spill your seed to one of those sexy Filipino ladies." Who am I to disobey God? Next thing I know, everyone is all upset at me. But it was fine because God called me up again and told me that
He forgave me. As what happens with friends, we didn't talk for a while. He must have been busy because he wasn't answering my calls. Then, out of the blue, He calls me up and tells me that I needed to make fun of these women's appearances. Lucky for me, He also called up our pal Larry and had him do the dirty work. After all, who am I to make fun of someone's appearance...oh wait, just kidding. Women are all supposed to be thin and beautiful. If they aren't they are ignoring God's will. Anywho, people got mad at me again! Can you believe it?!? Well, you know what? It doesn't matter because God texted me saying that He forgives me. So go cram it with walnuts, uglies. God told me to do all this. You all are a bunch of heathens who don't understand and mock that which you don't understand.
I understand God.
I have been forgiven by Him. So suck it! I'm out!"